Love At First Night

I am a stranger
She looks at me and seems so confused-
I'm not sure because I'm not looking at her-
It's impossible too- because-
the room is spinning, time has stopped, My equilibrium is fucked- and I feel sick because my heart just dropped.
I can't say I'm in love- With what? I can't see.

I feel you getting closer to me- each second.
Perhaps -This only exists inside my head-
Chances are you don't feel the same -
Wouldn't that suck- If my instincts were wrong and you aren't my everything.
My friends laugh and say "You have built her up way too high"
Still I do argue- that that's a lie...

I am crazy to care for you so much- I don't know you-
I've never felt your touch- I've never even made you blush.


I went through the darkest days of my life... Is it too much to ask for some sunshine with you?
You are adorable. I want to see you right now... So I close my eyes...

When I see you its hard to breathe
I'm excited because I think you might be my oxygen girl here to breathe life into me...
I stare but it's not creepy- It's looking at the right places and not for too long...
I wonder what it would be like to kiss you and if for some reason I was the man for you-
How simple the rest of my life would be-
I'd never have to search again because you'd be standing right next to me.


I ask her out the best I can- but she gives no answer.
I'd rather have a yes or no anytime... Damn nowadays it really doesn't pay to be a nice guy...

These Warm sensations begin to travel up my spine- I swallow my ego long enough to let words flow on without me.
Her eyes shift to the ground as my sounds continue to splash into her ears.  "I love you"
I watch her start to wonder how and why? She says "A lot of guys want to date me right now- But I think you are a really nice guy!"
She does not love me.

There is silence from her eyes.
I rub my chest to warm my senses.

Words continue to write themselves inside of me bleeding ink into my walls.
My skin is now tattooed with writings of you.
She says "I never meant to hurt you."
I just wanted to rescue her, hold her, and save her from decades of empty tears.
I never will.

I google how to make a girl love you but there is no good advice. Can you believe that?
Perhaps some of this worked in the 80's.

I am defeated because my attempts make me vulnerable- still I must risk this pain for her affection.
My words continue to rain on her ears until her face is all I see.

Her hair will never fall on my face-

 I will never rescue her- She is not for me to save...

I don't breathe as well as I used to- I cringe when her eyes land on mine- so defined by my failure.
The colors of my waves and words are not seen- black and white it seems is all I'm left to dream.
Could I be more receptive to her sacred thoughts and hidden plea's??
Now I'm left a scavenger in the night for her lost hopes and desires.
I search for new themes to prove her theory wrong.
I must trust the fluid movements of my pen- A door for my discovery so I can begin.
I don't simulate my affection still she wonders if i am true...
She ignores my superheated phrases that long to end in paradise.


I roll my fingers down my arm to make sure I can still feel- to make sure I did not lose myself in all this darkness.


Go ahead... Ignore me.
I just love you how a man should... Completely.